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Tuesday, 22 September 2015

Egg story recount


Yesterday we had gone out for an exciting race of egg races. We had each got a brown egg
and his name was Omariz JR we had time to draw his face before the race, I was so confused
that what was going on. Who knew that our teacher was about to tell us to do something weird.

Omariz JR was born on the 21st of september 2015 he was the weirdest egg child we had ever sawn. Omariz JR looked cool but one thing, He had a small face. big eyes small body He was just was not my type. We had got the name from Omari and mubz so we added it and it was Omariz JR Omariz JR had heaps of fun with me and Omari and I did to we the most fun ever with a egg!

When me and Omari first took Omariz JR to the playground I felt so nervous because he was so fragile. When we got our spoons we had to put him on the spoon and Omari had to compete with the other competitors. Omari had to go across the playground up and down he did well but then cracked the eggs bottom by running to me. Then it was my turn to take the egg back to the other side I had fast walked but luckily when I ran to the end I had not dropped it. Egg races are interesting and fun, we also learnt how fragile eggs can be.

When it was time to go back to class it was my turn to hold. I basically put put the egg in my pocket and held it back to class. As I took it out of my pocket I saw it cracking Omari was fired up at me, he was so angry it is like he was asset with the egg.

What I think about the egg friend race is it was interesting on how you can balance eggs on a spoon.

I had a lot of fun with Omariz JR. Omari won’t even put him in the bin I said to him “ it is just an egg why can’t you cook it.” And that was the egg story.

My Recount Rubric
Recount Writing

1
2
3
4
Write for my reader
I've tried to think about my reader
My writing shows some awareness of reader because my writing is quite clear and I have tried to interest my reader.
My writing is easy to understand and I have tried to tell the reader what it was like to be there by giving details and my thoughts.
My writing really considers audience as reader because I have kept their interest and made them feel like they know exactly what it was like for me.
Purpose
I tried to meet the purpose
My text goes some way towards meeting the purpose
The message is clear in some parts of the recount.
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Introduction
My introduction does not yet clearly orientate or hook in my reader.
My introduction gets some buy in from audience and they can understand what I am going to write about.
My introduction hooks in my reader and it is clear what I am writing about.
My introduction
wows my reader!
Paragraph Topics
My paragraphs are confused and don't follow my plan.
I have tried to follow my plan.
Most my paragraphs are about 1 big idea and I have added some detail.
My paragraphs have some complex as well as simple sentences. Post paragraphs give details about 1 big idea.
I have followed the paragraph topic in my plan.
My paragraphs have complex and simple sentences. Paragraphs all give details about 1 big idea.



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